In December of last year, my family went on a long road trip to 11 different cities in the United States. One of the cities we visited was San Francisco.
When I went to San Francisco, it was love at first sight - I still dream about it. I was enchanted by the buildings, by the atmosphere, the people, and of course, the food. Heck, I even loved the heavy rain that drenched us. San Francisco felt like the kind of home I had dreamt about my whole life, without ever knowing how badly I wanted it.
It feels almost silly to say that when we left San Francisco, a city I had only been in for no longer than 10 hours, I felt like I was leaving my home, I felt like I was leaving a little part of me behind. I had never experienced this kind of love for a location before. Like I said, it was love at first sight.
I told myself that I will live there one day, even if it was for 3 months, 6 months, a lifetime but I will live there.
Was it naive of me to think that I was going to find San Francisco on this Island? I had dreamt of falling in love instantly with Saint Lucia, and well, there have been a few bumps along the way.
These are the kinds of bumps that come with going to any new place - or so I assume. The lifestyle change, the change in levels of comfort and the cultural change. It's so strange to think that back in Canada, I knew exactly who I was, what my values were, where I stood on things and now that I'm in a new context, I feel more lost.
I hope I figure it out soon. Thankfully, Saint Lucia has been patient with me. I have only been here a week after all.
The beauty of this marvellous country has been slow to reveal itself to me, with still aways to go but I find comfort in the fact that I have so much more to learn about this place, and more importantly, the time to do it.
The kindness I have experienced here is beyond anything I could have ever expected and with so many teachers found along the way - from my supervisor to the young girls I have the pleasure to work with, some of whom has been open enough to share their stories with me. I feel so privileged and honoured.
Others have shared their foods with me, such as mangos in a salty mixture called "Mango in Sauce," (it seriously feels like all the rage with the kids here), tamarind balls, guava cheese, coconut cake, float, acckra, and wax apples (pictured below). What better way to enjoy something new than with food?
I know I am going to be okay. I feel a tad bit stuck and liberated at the same time. I'm excited and scared. One thing I know for sure: I know I'm in the place I'm supposed to be. My job definitely fits me.
So, who knows, I may not find San Francisco but I may just end up finding paradise.
Until next time,
-Ko.
lucky girl! Wishing you well. You're living the definition of 'adventure'. I'm quite envious and living vicariously through you but I can't help but say the same: I'm where I'm supposed to be too.
ReplyDelete"Not until we are lost do we begin to find ourselves" - Henry David Thoreau
ReplyDeleteGoing abroad and working like this stirs up a lot of conflicting values and beliefs. You may find that you abandon some of your previous ideals for new ones, or make slight alterations to them. But honestly, I think sometimes there will always be a bit of conflict between who you are at home and who you are abroad. I think that can be a strength though, because it allows you to see a wider range of perspectives. Keep up the awesome work, and the great blogs and fabulous pictures!